My Life in Simple Words
My account as I journey through Life
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Monday, December 13, 2004

The guy in the mirror

Today while dressing up, I had one of those rare opportunities of checking myself up in the mirror and truly looking at myself without blinking or turning (Guess it was the fact that It was a holiday and I knew I wasn't going to work).

But I wasn't happy with what I saw, when I looked at that mirror and the guy on the other side of the mirror. For I longer knew that guy,
I no longer knew what he stood or fort for,
I no loger felt what he believed in,
I no longer understood him,
and I longer felt him as part of my life any more or what I thought I knew to be the meaning of living in harmony with the man inside.

Further more when I looked deeper I saw the man that condemns me,
critizes everything I do,
the man that knows my inner most secrets and thoughts and uses them against me especially when am at the pick of my happiness,
the man that reminds me of my weakness and the things unconquered in my life when I try to flex my muscles,
the man that laughed when I said I liked something but in essence I was lying,
And the man that knows my deepmost fears.

When I saw this I thought this was the best time to get rid of him once and for all. A time to put an end to him and all the misery he had caused me and close that chapter in my life.

While still thinking about this, the other man in the mirror started to talk as well, and he told me to move closer; which I did, then he told me to take a very good look at him and look deep into his eyes. When I did this I saw the face was very familiar and when I looked at his eyes I saw darkness the equivalent of an abyss.

That's when it hit me that the person I was staring at was none other than me, and the eyes were staring back at me (when you stare at the abyss, the abyss stares back at you).

So all this time I realized, I have fort myself, hated myself, misunderstood myself and neglected myself in the name of trying to run the race of life, and in return, the very person has done the same to me.

And that was my encounter with the guy in the mirror.

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