My Life in Simple Words
My account as I journey through Life
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Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Dropping the mask

So where do I begin, for I seem to have alot to say but lack the words or ability to translate them into letters.

First alot has happened; am trying to regain my balance and stable my boat after going through a 'major' turbulence. Its funny to think that I had seen no way of making it to shore and alive but me posting this today is an indication that I made it.

While in the turbulence, wondering what I was going to do and crying out to God, asking Him where He was and Why he was taking too long to answer; I learnt something about myself that I was too ashamed to admit, and that was the fact that I have been wearing masks especially when my relationship with God was concerned and on top of that all this time I have been wearing masks for everyone, for everyplace and every situation in my life.

And this masks have resulted in my allienation, walls in my life, unhappiness I have been experiencing and the sense of being alone as far as God was concerned.

But the hard part comes, when I have realized that for I to experience a breakthrough both in my life, relationship with God and with men, I have to let go of this masks and be the person God really wants me to be.

But trust me after trying out! I have already felt the contraints and the pull backs. I know the old man in me doesn't like this and doesn't like this even a single bit. But am sure this is the time to ask God to give me the need strength to fight myself if I am to win this war.

So the journey still continues, I know there is more yet to come, more storms to face, rivers to cross and battles to conquer. But what gives me hope is the fact that He was with me and even though I might feel His is far away, Thats when He is very near.

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