Friday, January 14, 2005
Reflections.
Daily I find myself coming into contact with another side of me, which I prefer not to reveal and I have been desperately trying to change.
Its a side of me that only I know and comprehends, its a side of me that I love to hate and its a side of that I have grown to know its a thorn, its a defect and you just can't tell anyone about it.
Had a nasty argument with youknowwho, which lead to them saying things, which somehow hurt me and made me realize that all this time they were angry with me.
Being acting like a zombie, doing this as if it isn't me doing them and behaving like a foreigner to my own self.
The month is almost coming to an end, am yet to do the things I had purposed to do, visit places I had planned to visit, talk to pple I had promised to talk to, drop habits I had decided to drop and stop doing things I had asked God to help me stop doing.
I feel as if am in a rotation right now, and things seem to be passing me in sonic speed and this just makes me feel.....I don't.
Funny enough I was selected as part of thecommitee and am happy (I don't know whether thats exactly how I feel about this) since it has brought about the sense of responsibility and accountability I needed to move me in the direction of change I have been asking God for.
School! I don't even want to go there...
Work! Am pressing on, one day at a time and asking God to help me live for Him in front of my comp, while surfing, listening to music, interacting with collegues and students, and in my room.
Home! You can guess from what I just told you...
Friends! Yet to drop some and yet to make the first move on others.
And those are my reflections
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